Real estate investment is a serious business. Sometimes, however, things can get too serious. Take a break and share a laugh with us as we peruse some of the best tenant, landlord, and property manager jokes out there.
1. Even Landlords Have Puns
The other day, I found a bunch of ants running around frantically in one of my properties. I felt bad for them, but they needed to be removed. Fortunately, I found a cardboard box and made a sort of makeshift house for them. Now, I am their landlord and they are my… Tenants.
2. King of the Castle
Recently, a tour guide was leading a group of tourists through a famous, ancient castle in Germany. “This castle was built nearly eight hundred years ago. All features are original – not one stone has been changed, not one wall has been altered, and not one upgrade, superficial or functional, has occurred in all these years.”
“Wow-” interrupted a woman, rolling her eyes. “They must have the same property manager I do.”
3. Utility Futility
Recently, my property manager called, wanting to discuss my obscenely high heating bill over the last few months.
“Come on by,” I told him. “My door is always open!”
4. When the Landlord’s Finally Had It
My landlord walked in the other day, threatening to kick me out. Her reason? I hadn’t made a single rental payment in years; just listen to what she had to say.
“Come on, son – you’re 35. Don’t you think it’s time you found a place of your own?”
5. The PM and the Yoga Instructor
Question: What did the yoga instructor say to her property manager after receiving an eviction notice?
6. Do Not Disturb Recently, my tenants called me over to their apartment for some repairs.
In the process, they mentioned that the occupants of the upstairs apartment were rather noisy. “Most nights,” he said, “they make a scene and stomp on the floors until well after two AM.”
“Wow,” I said. “And that doesn’t bother you?”
“Not really,” said the tenant. “I’m usually up that late anyway, practicing my trumpet.”
7. Even Landlords Seek Help
Question: Why was the landlord seeing a psychiatrist, a clinical psychologist, and a licensed counselor?
Answer: He had an apartment complex!
8. It’s a Fair Statement
I recently overheard two women on the train discussing their apartments.
“My landlord only reaches out when he needs something from me,” complained one.
“Oh, I know!” Sympathized the other. “Landlords are so stuck up. It’s like they own the place!”